Plus Size Style and Fashion Blog
So today’s post isn’t just about how cute this dress is. It’s about my relationship with my body and how I’ve noticed I need to work on my body acceptance post-lockdown.
Welcome to Saturday, I hope all’s well with you guys? It’s been so long since I put together a style post that I’ve sort of forgotten how to write one. Yay! But I’m back to glorify obesity by asking the question, ‘Can A Plus Size Wear a Fitted Skirt?’ The answer is pretty obvious — yes!
How are we all doing? I’ve honestly had a weird week, and I’m ready for it to end. But today I’m showing off another little set from Revival Lingerie, so hold onto your hats guys, the back rolls are back!
So after my last post from Revival Lingerie, I got a wonderful response from people. It’s not a concern for me to open up about my mental health or my issues with my body, as we know. But standing in my underwear was genuinely terrifying. But I faced the fear, and I was lucky enough to only receive one string of bad comments.
Now, I realise that to many, you might think I’m asking for my body to be critiqued by posting these photos. If you’re here to tell me I’m glorifying obesity — I’d suggest you leave. My body is not to be commented on, this is just for illustration of the underwear of which I’m reviewing. It’s to help others find nice knickers, purely.
Plus, you know what I AM glorifying? My own body, and my body only. If it helps other people find underwear or strength to love themselves, then I’ve done more than my job. No one is going to gain a load of weight to look like me, but they might just realise that their body is absolutely fine the way it is.
But I digress — let’s talk about knickers, right?
In my last review I mentioned how the circle-stitched bullet bra wasn’t quite my shape, since my breasts aren’t quite full enough to fit them. The remedy to that? This subtly pointed bra!
It has a slightly more rounded point to the cups, so it’s a better option for newbies and weird busts like mine! But it also means this bra isn’t as tight on the top of the bust, which makes it so much more comfortable. It doesn’t look or feel as tight as the other style, too.
The same with the 030 bra from the last post, I’m wearing a 38D due to the 38E being too large in the cups. However, this one is a much better fit for me. The band is still too tight — but the good news is that Revival Lingerie will be bringing some more band sizes too!
I love french knickers. They look so comfortable and classy… on anyone but me. This is the second pair of french knickers I’ve tried, and they really aren’t for me at all.
Not that they’re not comfortable and soft — because they’re pretty lovely to wear, and the lace isn’t scratchy at all! But sadly the shape of french knickers in general just does nothing for me. I feel like I’m wearing boxing shorts from the 40s, but I also happen to be Danny DeVito.
I took the 5XL in these, and I’d size down according to your hip size, since the waist is very generous!
So between this post and my last post, my thoughts on Revival Lingerie are as thus; they’re a great value brand for any of your vintage-styled underwear needs.
Beginners will find great styles to ease them into foundation garments; I recommend the 008 bra or the 018 bra, the 067 briefs and 064 6 strap suspender belt.
Old hats will find some great value pieces that work well for everyday wear; I recommend the 030 bra, the 031 power net girdle and the 81 power net suspender belt.
Lingerie; C/O Revival Lingerie
Peignoir; Vintage from Beyond Retro
Working more hours has really taken a toll on me, and I’ve become quite unorganised in all aspects of my life. My mental health is rocky at the moment. And thanks to bad eating habits I’ve gained a load of weight I’m uncomfortable with. Adding to that, I’ve been awful at blogging which is straining my relationship with brands I work with. So I’ve decided to put aside some time so that once a month I can sit down and talk some real life problems with you, like mental health and body positivity.
Welcome to Sit Crooked and Talk Straight — a new segment of the blog where I chat some shit and talk about slightly heavier subjects than just fashion. Today, since I’m having weight-related-troubles, I’m taking a moment to remember life before I loved my body.
It’s always been fat, as far as I can remember. Maybe not fat fat, but I can’t say I’ve ever been a ‘normal’ size. Baby fat turned into chubby cheeks. Chubby cheeks turned into chunky thighs. And chunky thighs ended up as a “Body Mass Issue” category on my medical record.
I have lived in this body for 27 and a half years. It is fat, as it has been for a long time. And I love it.
But in those 27 and a half years, I haven’t always loved it.
There has been tears, pain, and shame. The severe depression that makes me want to hide my fat body to this day. The cuts across my skin from my anger at my fatness. The embarrassment of sores when my thighs rub. The fear of smelling bad. The wandering of my worth. The disordered eating, intermittently starving or bingeing. The drugs, the booze. The fact that I never took my fucking clothes off in front of another person until I was nearly in my 20s.
There has been the insanity that I believed that – as a fat woman – I would never feel the joy of being loved.
I wish I could say that there’s some special, sudden way of waking up and loving your body for all it is. And I wish that it was as simple as wearing some nice knickers, or posting up a great inspirational quote on Instagram and hoping for the best.
In fact, it took me so many years to start loving myself for the body that I have — that I can’t pinpoint when I actually started. The likelihood is it’s around the same time I went to university, got into a serious relationship and then promptly lost everything I worked for in a single day. Depression, which I’ve talked about before, took over, and somehow in the end I gave up on that idea and wanted to be in love with me.
You see, my body has lumps and bumps and stretch marks galore. It has scars all over from happier memories such as falling down drunk with friends, and less happy such as being a self-harmer for many years. My bum is spotty, my boobs are small and I think I keep breaking my toe because it always hurts. I have adult acne, doctors can’t tell me why I’m still so tired or growing a beard, and I haven’t shaved my legs in god knows how long.
And I work on a daily basis to say that with love. Because these are all parts of my body, and I have to learn to love it for everything it is. Not despite of these things, and not because of them. They just are what they are, and I love them.
I took my clothes off for sex for the first time when I was 19. As much as I hate to say that my first real foray into loving myself was linked to a man, I can’t deny that being fat and being adored didn’t have a part in it.
After that, I learned to be naked. Now, being naked has been paramount to loving my body. Seeing myself in a mirror without shape wear, without hiding my stomach under high waisted skirts — it forces you to see you for you.
Honestly, if you’re reading this now, take two minutes to get naked and look at yourself in the mirror. Tell yourself that you love that image, and if you don’t believe it now — repeat once daily until you do. That’s the biggest part of my journey, really. Taking something I hated — being naked — and turning it into something positive.
It’s not the only step, of course. And it’s not going to work for every single person in the world, either. But I personally think it’s the most important step. Loving yourself out of clothing gives you a better idea of how your body sits in clothing — of which some people use as a way of building confidence. Nudity is related to sex and relationships, and strong relationships that are supportive and loving will always give you a strong foundation. All of these things are stepping stones to the point where you love yourself unconditionally.
Find your own way — and work a little every day to change your mindset on your body. Nothing external can happen until the internal is sorted — as RuPaul says “If you can’t love yourself, how in the hell you gonna love someone else” (FYI, I hate Ru but that’s a great line). It works the same for changing habits.
Now go get naked in the mirror and tell yourself how beautiful you are for everything you are right now!
Happy Saturday, gorgeous people! I hope everyone is okay; yesterday on socials I dedicated to talking about mental health due to Wednesday being Mental Health Awareness Day. Although this post in particular has nothing to do with mental health, it might be worth having a look, especially since I shared some free resources. You can find me on social media platforms here. But how about we get onto happier notes with some Saturday Style?
I have a lot of admiration for people who do 40s style, but I can’t say it’s ever been one I thought I could get away with. I always think of the 1940’s as being a thin person thing. And something I’m not allowed to do. It’s wrong to think that, of course. There’s plenty of plus women wearing, and looking incredible in pre-50’s fashions. It just seemed like it wouldn’t suit me because of my size and shape.
The only way to combat that thinking?
Give it a go! So when I teamed up with Top Vintage Boutique to review an item, it was the perfect time to try a new brand, plus a new style entirely!
The colour of this Geraldine Swing Dress caught my eye instantly. I’ve mentioned I love greens before, but there’s something about this colour that is so perfectly autumnal and beautiful.
The Geraldine Swing dress by Vintage Chic for Top Vintage is actually labelled as a 50s dress. However, I think the bodice and half-volume of the skirt would make it more 40’s, don’t you think? At least, it’s not quite petticoat-level of poof, which I always put down to 40’s styling.
So let’s get down to it, right? I took the 18 in this dress, since the size guide told me that I’d actually fit it! You might know from other posts that I’m generally a pretty standard UK22, so it was surprising.
Honestly, I don’t think this is a great fit for me personally. But that’s my sizing judgement instead of the dress itself, since it’s one roomy size 18! However, as much as I know it’s not a great fit, it’s also not a bad fit. It’s certainly not an unwearable dress by any means!
This is the largest size available in this dress — so I am sorry, my larger darlings! They do have quite a few dresses in sizes 18-24 on their website, though.
My guide for ordering this dress in particular is to go by the bust measurements, instead of the waist as I usually suggest. There’s generous stretch in the Geraldine, which I would put as more of a UK20 than a UK18. But I found the bust to be more constricting than any other part of the dress. It’s not unsightly, of course, but an extra inch or two for boobs would have really been helpful!
This dress is irresistible, however. I mentioned that I loved the colour dearly, and I think its great on me. The first green that doesn’t look Christmassy with my hair, either!
But then there’s the bodice – the neckline has a keyhole and pussy bow effect that is very sweet. However, the keyhole neckline is just a touch lower than 40’s styling – so a little décolletage may just peek through!
Top Vintage Boutique’s shipping is great, considering they’re based in The Netherlands. The dress turned up neatly packaged in a branded box only three days later from when I ordered. They ship to the UK and USA for FREE, too, so there’s no reason to not pick up some Top Vintage Exclusives!
The best part about trying new clothing styles is that I can also try new hairstyles alongside it! I don’t do much more with it than my usual pageboy style, but I just about got this fluffy half-poodle to work for me. I used Cherry Dollface’s tutorial, and for a first go it’s not so bad. Definitely need some more volume, though!
Earrings; Bow and Crossbones
Necklace; Vintage (Similar)
Dress; C/O Top Vintage Boutique (Disclaimer)
Bangles; Splendette and vintage
Stockings; What Katie Did
Shoes; Miss L Fire
Its style Saturday today, but I wanted to take this week to do something a bit different from usual. Most weeks I’m dressing up to the nines to show my best side for you. Especially since I’m reviewing products a lot lately that deserve perfect imagery. However, this week I wanted to show you that it’s not all sunshine and rainbows, and that’s okay. So I present some very casual plus size style today!
I mention my mental health on here in the most fleeting way possible, usually a line in my first paragraph of each post. I do this because it’s a really important part of my day-to-day life, especially when I’m not in a particularly great way. Sadly, the last two weeks or so have been in that vein.
I have depression and anxiety, the former I’ve dealt with for a lot of my life, and the latter joined on in as I started to get older. Over the last few years, it’s gotten worse. Luckily, since moving to my current area two years ago I’ve been taken more seriously, and my doctors have been much better with dealing with mental health issues. London is notoriously bad for their mental health services, but thankfully Haringey council is one of the better ones.
A few posts back I mentioned taking it slower to focus on myself – before I was working two jobs, six days and a minimum of 50 hours a week. It was draining, let me tell you. I wasn’t happy, or looking after myself at all. My blogging started to wain, my creativity had practically died and I found myself wondering why I bothered constantly.
In that post on my latest sewing project, I mentioned how important creativity was for me, and how much happier I was cutting hours and changing things around. And I really do recommend taking more time for yourself – although I’m in a funk, it’s been so much easier than before!
I mentioned how I dress up a lot for social media, which is true. I do dress the way you see on my blog the majority of the time, but when I’m in a slump, I just don’t have the energy to look like that. Sometimes my depression and anxiety just makes it too hard to be that perfectly dressed person every day.
So when on a wander with my boyfriend last week, I decided to take some photos of my less-than-glamorous outfit. I had planned on dressing up with my hair done and showing off as I usually did, but the reality is that I just couldn’t bring myself to put the effort in. And it feels a little freeing, honestly.
This day was possibly the best day in two weeks. For some reason my anxiety and depression hit hard, and I’ve not been too well. My sleep is awful, my mood fluctuating rapidly, and don’t get me started on the tears. I dropped some milk and cried for an hour. It’s that irrational.
The weekend was a low point for me – I had such a difficult time going to a friend’s night because I believed I wasn’t wanted. I believed no one would miss me if I didn’t show up. The smallest part of me that knew it wasn’t true managed to push me there, and I really enjoyed my night. But to begin with I was skittish, on the verge of tears and my chest was hurting from panic attacks.
It’s not a pleasant thing to suffer with these things – and it’s so much more common than we’ve allowed ourselves to believe. Talking helps, that’s for sure. And taking steps to be honest with yourself and the people around you is the most important.
There’s no cure for depression. But there’s medication (I take paroxetine which has been great for me for a few months) which takes the edge off. There’s counselling and therapies of all sorts. And support groups, too. It takes a while to work out what works for you. Discuss with your doctor what could be best for you.
I guess in a way, I wanted to do this post to tell not only myself, but others that it’s okay to not be okay. It’s okay when you’re not a perfect version of yourself every day. And it’s definitely okay to wear your struggles with pride. I fight this constantly, so why shouldn’t I be proud?
Have a wonderful week, guys! And remember – you’re loved, worthy, valid and amazing.
Necklace; Handmade (Similar)
Dress; Boohoo (Similar)
Belt; Primark (Similar)
Bag; Vendula London (Disclaimer)
Happy Saturday darlings! Okay, so this is possibly one of my favourite collaborations to date. I was quite fortunate to be asked to review an amazing piece, the Orchard Corset 426 Longline!
Before we get started, I wanted to dedicate a little paragraph to talking about body confidence in relation to corsets. I love corsets as a dramatisation of the figure, similar to how make up is the dramatisation of the face. I’m an every-now-and then corset wearer, sometimes I wear it every day for a week or two, sometimes I wear it for special occasions. I’m not tight-lacing to change my body, although there’s nothing wrong with that.
I do love my body in a corset, but I also love my body out of it. It’s just exaggerated, and doesn’t mean that one way or the other is good or bad. So now I’ve got that out of the way, welcome to a very full review of my Orchard Corset experience!
Orchard Corset has a wealth of information to help you decide what corset is best for you. From how firm or squishy you are, to how to measure yourself and even how to work out what length you’d need. Before I’d even chosen the corset I was going to review, Amber had sent me everything I needed to work out what was going to work with my body type. These videos are amazing, even as a semi-seasoned corset-wearer with corset-fitting training, these were incredibly helpful.
For a frame of reference, here are my measurements;
Together we worked out the 426 was the ideal shape, and I was asked to choose between the standard and the longline shapes. I will say that I was advised the longline may not work perfectly, and Amber would not ordinarily suggest it for a torso length under 11″. I chose it regardless, since I wanted a corset that would sit further down on my stomach than others.
It was also suggested to me to go for the 426 design with hip ties. These allow a little extra room for the hips as you get closer and closer to closing through training. It also means that you can allow easy readjusting throughout the day as your stomach expands or deflates. It’s good for loosening after eating a whole pizza to yourself, haha!
The first thing I did after I opened my 426 Longline was re-lace. I’d read on other reviews about Orchard Corset lacing a hole above the middle, and my personal preference is the lacing meets in the exact middle. Then I got excited and tried to see how far this bad boy can go!
Obviously, I did as you usually do with corsets – for just over a week I wore it loosely laced for roughly an hour in the evenings. Each day, as it got used to my body shape and I got used to it, I laced it just a tad tighter.
Then came the real test! As you might have seen on my Instagram stories recently, I’ve been wearing my 426 at work. Why work? I’m out of the house between 11-13 hours of the day, I move a lot, and I have to bend and carry boxes around now and then. I wanted to see just how well this corset could cope with daily activities. This is always the best test for me, and I found that it was incredibly comfortable for wearing for long periods of time!
I love this corset, I really do. My other corset is a ReStyle.pl corset, which is super curvy in the hips, possibly moreso that this. However, this 426 is insanely comfortable in comparison! I’ve worn it for up to 13 hours in a day and it’s not affected my daily movement.
Laced tightly like this, the corset is perfect – but my daily wearing isn’t as tight as this. The 34″ would’ve been just that touch more comfortable, and you can see in the photo above the modesty panel doesn’t quite meet at the back even at it’s tightest.
I’d also like to put emphasis on Orchard Corset’s warning of the length of the 426 longline. I stupidly forgot that my torso from my underbust to waist is smaller than average, and although it’s a longer corset in the stomach, it’s just a tad too high! It doesn’t affect the wearing, however it does force me to sit a little too upright, which can feel awkward at times.
This is an amazing corset, robust with twelve steel bones plus a steel busk. Ideal for tight lacing and corset training in a smaller size, but I’d go for the size up for daily wear. Would I get another Orchard Corset again? Absolutely! I have my eye on the mesh 426 standard in a 34″ now I know my ideal sizing.
What do you guys think?
Orchard Corset’s corsets come in an amazing range of fabrics and shapes, most in sizes 16″ – 46″, which is an amazing size range. If you’re interested in purchasing a corset, simply send them an email to get a personalised recommendation!
Hairflower; Handmade
Dress; Boohoo Plus (Old, similar here)
Bra/Harness; Simply Be (Old, Similar here)
Corset; C/O Orchard Corset (Disclaimer)
Bangles; Vintage and Splendette
So straight up – I have a Boohoo addiction. I never really expected to be the person that would wear Boohoo’s style, honestly. But ever since my first pencil skirt I have to say I’m hooked. My most recent purchase was this plus size pencil dress, and I love it!
When I talk to others about plus size brands, I always lovingly call Boohoo “Hoe clothes for Fattos.” I personally have no problem with the words fat or hoe, FYI, I mean no malice by the words in any way! But I think the phrase works well for Boohoo Plus. What it does better than any other plus size brand is that it doesn’t dictate what fat women SHOULD wear.
Plus-sized women reading this will understand what I’m saying straight away. There’s so many brands that will refuse to acknowledge we have waists. Or maybe we’d like to wear shorts. Or tight skirts! And god-forbid if we want to wear something that shows our sexuality.
Boohoo isn’t about that life. Most of the time, their clothes are exactly the same as their straight sizing. They aren’t designing anything differently other than the size. Which means they’re keeping the short skirts, keeping it tight and oozing sexuality. Which is what I adore about Boohoo.
Now, I started pretty strong with this post, which will seem a bit strange now I’m going to talk about my body hang ups again. I’ve mentioned before that I have a real problem with my mid-section, mostly my stomach. However the photo above nearly kills me with self-hate. I have a crap butt that isn’t peachy and cute. I have a big, overhanging tummy that is more than visible. The anxiety is so real.
But the biggest challenge I’m setting myself this year is to stop being scared. Mostly of my body and putting it in things I’m not used to. Wearing flared skirts and dresses for me is my comfort zone. I hide the things I hate behind petticoats and pleats, and it’s where I’m my most comfortable. But hiding my body isn’t accepting and loving it – so the challenge is to wear more tight things and love it!
Lastly, as for the dress itself? I bought it in the sale and it’s sadly not available now (similar here). I’m constantly surprised by the quality of Boohoo dresses versus the price! This particular dress is a textured rayon-feeling fabric with gorgeous rose appliqués. I took the 22 in this dress, as I usually do with their dresses and the fit is pretty spot on. Really, I could go for a little more room for the tum, but that’s possibly just my body-anxiety. I’ll get there.
Darlings, have you used Boohoo before? Or maybe you have some tips to help me get over my body issues? Hell, maybe you have your own you want to share? Talk to me in the comments!
Dress; Boohoo Plus
Harness Bra; Playful Promises
Bangles; Vintage
Bag; Vendula London
Shoes; Primark (old)
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Do you ever have certain outfits that you wear over and over? Ones that you put on and just go “Yes, perfect.” This is certainly one of those outfits! So I’ve got a bit of plus size style for you – with some school vibes!
This is an eShakti dress I bought roughly two years ago, and I adore it! I love any sort of grid patterned fabrics, as you could tell from my Gingham Obsession in the summer and my tartan love through the winter.
It’s one of those dresses I wear all autumn and winter long because it takes so little styling to look great! Because it’s two years old now, it’s sadly not available on their site anymore – but they do have the Puff Sleeve Plaid Shirt Dress and the Tie Neck Windowpane Shirt Dress which are similar!
The thing that I love the most about eShakti and their products is that each garment is customisable. On the site this dress had short sleeves, a pointed collar and a short skater skirt. I was able to extend the sleeves to below the elbow, the skirt to a midi and add a peter pan collar! I mean, how often do you find an amazing dress that just isn’t quite what you want? eShakti makes it so easy.
I think they’re US only, which is the biggest pain ever. When I ordered from them I shipped them to my US friend and she shipped them to me (Thanks again, Sarah!) so it took roughly two months to get to me. But, after two years there’s so much life in them, so you can’t complain, right?
So after last weeks post talking about my personal issues with parts of my body and body image, I wanted to say a few things. Mostly thank you – as much as it sounds ridiculous and overly vain, your comments and love was quite amazing. And it does help hearing other’s positive affirmations, since it helps you suddenly believe these things about yourself and for yourself.
My feelings towards my body have been so much more positive because of that post and the interaction. It just goes to show how the internet isn’t all bad – we can all support each other in our self love and body positivity journeys, and it’s just so beautiful to see.
I love you guys.
Earrings and Brooch; Bow and Crossbones
Dress; eShakti | Bolero; Collectif
Shoes; Miss L Fire | Bangles; Vintage and Splendette
Bag; Vendula London (Disclaimer)
There’s one thing you might notice about this image. That thing just might be a pencil skirt. It might just be this pretty bloody amazing velvet Boohoo Plus pencil skirt!
So if you’re following me on Instagram (@MelodyMae if not!) you may have seen over the Halloween period that I sported something scary – a pencil dress! I became a bit obsessed with Boohoo during my Halloween Lust List, and I bought the Skeleton Midi Dress. It fit perfectly, and for the entire evening I felt somewhat amazing.
But because of my insecurities surrounding my tummy, I’ve not worn a pencil style in years. I touched upon this with my post on a straight skirt here, but not too much has changed in my actual feelings towards my body. I love myself, I do. But part of that loving myself has been wrapped up in an image of myself in flared dresses. Therefore I’m pushing myself to change.
These photos can be hard to look at in moments. I notice my tummy more than anything, how my butt isn’t an ideal shape, and how I really wish I’d worn a corset to cinch me in more.
Don’t get me wrong; I love this skirt. It’s super stretchy (go a size down) and feels like a dream on. Plus it was £15, and I’m not joking when I say Boohoo quality is phenomenal. However, there’s still this part of me that believes that my body is not good enough for a pencil skirt.
Part of challenging myself is being able to stand in front of this camera in the middle of a park and invite people to look at me and wonder what I’m doing. It’s being uncomfortable and building up each moment of courage. It’s sticking the photos up on my blog and allowing the world to see me, lumpy butt and overhang tummy and all.
So then there’s the moments that I look at myself and think; “Damn girl you look fine”. And it’s all worth it. Because this body is MY body and it’s fucking wonderful in all it’s fatness and beauty.
Unrelated to that, though, is my new favourite accessory;
The NOPE beret of dreams! After the Cactus tie on hat I made in October, I was thinking of more winter-appropriate hat to customise. As a result, the NOPE beret was born! Using some gold trim and a pre-made beret I can now ‘nope’ my way out of all situations by proxy. Likewise, it’s a great retort for catcalling. Point at your hat and swan away!
Even more, I’ve got a tutorial ready for you so you can make your own!
Beret; Handmade | Earrings; Bow and Crossbones
Necklace; Primark (old) | Brooch; Luxulite
Top; Primark (old) | Skirt; Boohoo Plus
Shoes; ASOS | Bag; Vendula London (Disclaimer)
